TO DO OR NOT TO DO?

BED NOW AND WED LATER? NO!

“We have been together for quite a while as bf and gf. You know deep down that you are the one am planning to marry. But, I don’t know if I am the one on your marriage mind, unless you prove it. Sweetheart, come to my bed now, and as you already know marriage bells will toll later.”

“I don’t believe much of what you said, but I think it’s reasonable. As a proof of my love, I will do as you’ve requested. You have shown your love by spending, not only your money, but time and energy on me.”

What is love without waiting (patience)?

Do not be deceived to believe that offering yourself to him/her for sex proves your love for her/him. What you would be doing by indulging in premarital sex is actually trading your hard earned value (virginity) to a five minute fun for nothing at all.

Bedding now with the intention of wedding later does nothing than put the success of your relationship into the physical and mental realm of impossibility, because there would be nothing to anticipate any more. Rest assured that once the package is opened you are bound to take a bite of it with the least provocation (temptation), especially on a day like today -Valentine’s day.

Life isn’t a rush, and so is love. The one that truly loves waits irrespective of the circumstances. To bed now and wed later is that one mistake that puts the success of relationships in jeopardy. A Life of Valued Endurance (LOVE) isn’t tested on any bed – king-size, queen-size, student size, cradle, whatsoever.
It is however tested on these three things: CARE, KINDNESS, and PATIENCE.


CARE manifests itself in how gentle your needs, as well as that of others are attended to. Care has a lot to do with heartfelt gentleness; gentleness that comes natural, not one that is faked. Be warned, CARE isn’t CARESS, SMOOCH, KISS, or SEX. It is sensitivity to human needs and expression of a feeling of great concern as defined by the dictionary.

KINDNESS and Giving walk hand in hand. Love seeks to liberate through the hands of kindness. And it is an act of kind or charitable behavior. True love manifests itself in the dedication of a person’s energy, time, gifts, talents, etc to the well-being of another person. Kindness is a subset of LOVE: there isn’t LOVE without kindness. Not all kindness leads to the altar, some are just a show of good friendship, be mindful.

PATIENCE. And finally, as they say, LOVE suffers long. To wait and have in focus the beautiful reward of waiting. The encouragement to wed before bed is woven in the fabric of this virtue of LOVE. His being able to wait proves his love, likewise you. Being able to tolerate delay is Patience defined in simple terms. The bedding will definitely happen, but not until the wedding.


All these three traits (expatriated above) come together to form sacrifice, and that is why a lot of people define love as sacrifice. Paraphrasing Ephesians 5:26, we understand that because Christ Jesus loved the church He gave Himself up for it, and so couples must replicate this kind of love.

When someone loves you truly; He is able to do whatever it takes to make you okay (CARE), he is able to give whatever it takes to set you free (KINDNESS), he is able to wait however long it takes to make you happy (PATIENCE).

If he/she refuses to see your love proven on these things, then she/he qualifies herself/herself for the exit. Do not wait a sec LONGER, pack him bag and baggage out!

Look for the above defined traits of LOVE and save yourself the pressure of bedding now and wedding later.

WED NOW AND BED LATER? YES!!!!

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