The mouth is a crucial part of the human body. Bible says he who controls his tongue controls his whole body. There are people who’s words really hurt, others speak words that pierce the soul, others speak without thinking when angry and yet there are people whose words bring life, words that calms the troubled breast. What kind of words proceed from your mouth?
The virtuous woman seasons her mouth with milk and honey so the words that come out of her mouth is wisdom and kindness. The 17th characteristic of the virtuous woman is that SHE ALWAYS SPEAKS WITH WISDOM . Proverbs 31:26 puts it this way “She opens her mouth with wisdom, and on her tongue is the law of kindness”.
A classical demonstration of this character was evidently seen in Abigail the wife of Nabal. Her words and acts saved her household from doom (1 Samuel 25:1-36). Hear what David testified of Abigail “blessed is your advice and blessed are you, because you have kept me this day from coming to bloodshed and from avenging myself with my own hand” (1 Samuel 25:33).
But like I have always said, you cannot give what you don’t have. It is out of the abundance of the heart that the mouth speaks. The virtuous woman speaks with wisdom and kindness because she feeds on wisdom and kindness from the Bible, good books and godly sources.
May your words bring warmth to the heart, hope to the hopeless and wisdom to the simple.
INFLUENCE and INTEGRITY are the two great virtues that clothe the virtuous woman. Wherever her feet has trod, influence and integrity was seen all around her. Proverbs 31:25 “Strength and honour are her clothing : she shall rejoice in time to come”.
Oh I love influence! I long for a life of influence. Wherever I go, I am determined to leave behind an indelible mark in the hearts of men. I make sure that someway somehow I add value to the life of others, especially by attacking people’s mindset. Virtuous woman in the making, you too must be influential.
The Proverbs 31 woman is a woman of integrity. A woman of complete moral soundness: her conscience alone will not permit her to be immoral, let alone the word of God.
So influence is her strength and integrity her honour.
The 14th characteristic of the virtuous woman is that she honours her husband.
Every woman must desire to be virtuous, and the Almighty God shall grant her a wise and faithful man for a husband, just like the Proverbs 31 woman. “Her husband is known in the gates, when he sits among the elders of the land” (Proverbs 31:23). The gates was a place where great men and elders gathered to take counsel, judge, and/or make decisions. Let me make it clear that the husband of the Virtuous Woman does not get appointment to sit among elders at the gates on account of his wife’s virtuousness but rather upon the merit of his own life. He was known at the gates for his wise contributions and excellent conduct.
So what then is the relationship between the virtuous woman and her husband being known in the gates? Good question! Now imagine that the virtuous woman’s husband has just finished making a submission among the elders and the old men stood up to salute, the young men covered their mouth and they asked one another “who is he?” And someone answers “Ah don’t you know him? He is Mad. Virtuous’s husband”. Here, the virtuous woman has become his crown, the icing on the cake making him more popular within the gates. All that they will be left to say is “Oh no wonder!”.
My lady, if you can picture this you will understand the need to pursue virtuousness with all alacrity. Don’t tear down the reputation he has taken time to build, add to his honour.
Men, there is work for you too: if you want to marry a virtuous woman then allow the word of God to build you, walk in God’s wisdom. Your mind must be as fertile as the womb of a woman.
When Queen Sheeba heard the fame of Solomon’s wisdom she said to herself, “seeing is believing”. One of the things that convinced her of Solomon’s wisdom was how the palace was kept in order as well as the apparel of all who were in Solomon’s palace (1 Kings 10:1-5). The virtuous woman lives a life of EXCELLENCE.
Appearance communicates volumes of words. Let your home read excellence. “She makes tapestry for herself; her clothing is linen and purple” (Proverbs 31:22). Amplified version puts it this way “she makes for herself coverlets, cushions and rags of tapestry. Her clothing is linen, pure and fine and purple (wool)”. The home of the virtuous woman radiates with EXCELLENCE and her family is clothed in excellence.
Although wealth will make excellence easily achievable, ensuring excellence is possible to all. Keep the home neat, patch up the torn curtains, let the children wear neat clothes, no shabby dressing, no unkempt hair, etc.
Whiles working on the physical excellence do not leave out spiritual excellence. Let righteousness and the fear of the Lord clothe your family. Teach Christ in your home that the garment of Christ might clothe everyone.
Proverbs 31:21 “She is not afraid of snow for her household, for all her household is clothed with scarlet”.
Snow, just like Harmattan, is part of nature, a season bound to happen within the year. What is left to do is prepare very well to face it head-on. What the virtuous woman does is sew scarlet way ahead of time for each member of her home, so as to be at peace knowing that her home shall be warm whenever the snow falls.
A conspicuous lesson from this is: As the days go by certain situations/ circumstances/ events (like failure, disappointment, difficulties) are inevitable. What you should do, as a virtuous wife, is to prepare the “scarlet” today for such inevitable situation tomorrow. Weave the scarlet with encouraging words, hopeful words and words of motivation. Share your life experiences with your children, bring out the lessons from that movies you are watching, discuss various scenarios. This will equip the people in your home to face the issues of life with wisdom and maturity. They will become immovable, unshakeable, and unbreakable.
So when her son trails an exam (God forbid), or her daughter goes to college and is far away from home, or her husband is heavily disappointed by friends, she is not stressed over the possibility that any will commit suicide or take any other negative action. For she is confident that her family can face any situation wisely: true overcomers.
You might have realised that the things that the virtuous woman does isn’t so different from what everyone else does. She just takes it a step further. Everyone can show some level of Generosity and Kindness at one point in life, likewise the virtuous woman. However, if the virtuous woman is to show some kindness towards you, you will also experience the sincerity behind her acts.
The virtuous woman is GENEROUS and KIND. Instead of waiting for those who need her assistance to come to her, the virtuous woman rather looks out for the needy and poor in her society and helps them. “She extends her hands to the poor, yes, she reaches out her hands to the needy (Proverbs 31:20)”.
Don’t be kind to only those who are capable of reciprocating your kind gesture. Let the needs of the less privileged in the society be of concern to you. And don’t go broadcasting how you paid Mr. Somebody’s bills, how you fed Mrs. Somebody’s children, or how you helped Mr. Somebody’s niece break an addiction, etc. The Bible say, don’t let your right hand know what the left hand is doing.
Virtuous one, stretch out your palms unto all and let the whole world feel your kind and generous character.
God bless you.
I must say, that ‘virtuousness’should not be confined only to the home settings. Even though the ‘virtuousness’ of the Virtuous Woman is predominantly exhibited at her home, she prominently displays a high level of ‘virtuousness’ at her work place, ventures, and every other places she finds herself. If you should analyse the outcome of her work, you would obviously discover the commitment, hard work and the expertise which were invested. One of such virtues she exhibits is …
The world celebrates exceptional people, not a jack of every thing and a master of nothing.
The 10th characteristic of the virtuous woman is that she demonstrates SKILLFULNESS and EXPERTISE at her profession or venture.
The Virtuous Woman is SKILLFUL
The Bible projects the Proverbs 31 woman as one who was into the fabric industry. She produces flax and wool from her field, converts then into fabric and trade the finished sashes on international markets. With great expertise, the virtuous woman stretches out her hands to work with the distaff and skillfully holds the spindle whenever she sits to produce clothing and sashes (Proverbs 31:19).
My lady, please do not confine your ‘virtuousness’ to the home alone. Display it at work and everywhere so that others may learn from you and glorify our Father in heaven. The world celebrates exceptional people, not a jack of every thing and a master of nothing. Aspire to be exceptionally good at your work and everything else that you do.